A Doc Of The Legendary BadFic- Starkit's Prophecy!
by XxBlueWillowTreexX
Summary: As the title says, this is a documentary on the legendary badfic now known as Starkit's Prophecy. Beware: It made me cry. Beware: It might make you cry. Beware: Some of the commentary is really sarcastic, and might have a little cussing. NOT FOR CHILDREN! And until I draw a cover for myself, the image was found on Google, thought it'd fit.
1. Allegiances

**Okay, this is Dianacutie, and I'm taking a documentary on the legendary bad-fic, Starkit's Prophecy. I hope that your reviews cheer me up so that I maybe won't cry at such disgraces to grammar and spelling. Please enjoy, and this is going to be a bloody and tearful experience!**

ALLIANCES

ok so like i said this iks my first story be nice plz

btw its set afte rsunset so

**I'm already scared.**

ThunderClan

Leader: Firestar - ginger tom with a flame-colored pelt

**... Just like the book...**

Deputy: Brambleclaw - dark brown tabby tom with amber eyes

Medicine Cat: JayFeather-gray tom

Warriors:

Squirrelflight - dark ginger she-cat with green eyes

Apprentice, Foxpaw

Dustpelt - dark brown tabby tom

Sandstorm - pale ginger she-ca

**She-cas are very pretty. Better than she-cats.**

Cloudtail - long-haired white tom

Apprentice DaisyPaw - cream long-furred cat from the horseplace

**How come Foxpaw didn't have a description?**

Brackenfur - golden brown tabby tom

Sorreltail - tortoiseshell-and-white she-cat with amber eyes

Thornclaw - golden brown tabby tom

Brightheart - white she-cat with ginger patches

Spiderleg - long-limbed black tom with brown underbelly and amber eyes

Whitewing - white she-cat with green eyes

Apprentice, Icepaw

Birchfall - light brown tabby tom

Graystripe - long-haired gray tom

Berrynose - cream-colored tom

Hazeltail - small gray-and-white she-cat

Mousewhisker - gray-and-white tom

Cinderheart - gray tabby she-cat

Poppyfrost - tortoiseshell she-cat

Honeyfern- light brown tabby she-cat

Lionblaze - golden tabby tom

Hollyleaf - black she-cat

FoxHeart-reddish tabby tom

**I thought Foxheart was a ShadowClan she-cat?**

IceFire-white she cat

**Isn't that supposed to be Icecloud?**

ToadRibbit-black—and-white tom

RoseFlame-dark cream she cat

**And Rosepetal?**

BriarStorm-dark brown she cat

**And Briarlight?**

BumbleFlower-very pale gray tom with black stipes

**Very manly, flowers, bees, black stipes. The whole package!**

BlossomWind-pale brown she cat iwth a dark stripe along her spine

**Again, Blossomfall. And isn't she calico with small white patches, like petals?**

Apprentices:

Fox DaisyPaw - cream long-furred cat from the horseplace

**Fox DaisyPaw. What a wonderful name!**

FlamePaw-firecolored she cat with one grnee eye one blue eye

**Grnee is the best color ever, am I wrong?**

LakePaw-bright blue gray she cat with blue eyes

The last 2 r starKits siters

**An A/N without a single warning? Da F**k?**

JazzPaw-red she cat with blue eyes and a black tail

**Ah, like the music. Very nice. Cats obviously know exactly what 'Jazz' is, totally catlike. And cats also know what music is. What a wonderful name!**

Queens:

Ferncloud - pale gray (with darker flecks) she-cat with green eyes mother of Dustpelts kits

**Not a single apostrophe? Ah. Very much with punctuation, right?**

Dawnsparkle-bright tortishell she cat with garguntan blue eye's mother of Jayfeathers' ktis, formaly of Shadowclan

**And here comes more of the terrible spelling. And isn't Jayfeather with Mrs. Stick and a Medicine Cat? #Scared #KillMeNow**

Kits:

StarKit-graysh-blue-and purple she cat with molting orange eyes and a white star on her forhaed

**Graysh. The best color ever. And isn't a white star on her head VERY natural?**

Elders:

Longtail - pale tabby tom with dark black stripes, retired early due to failing sight

Mousefur - small dusky brown she-cat

Weaslepelt-big red tabby he cat with bight yellow eyes (hes Rowanclaw's dad, he came to Thunderclan when Dawn- did0

**If Weaslepelt was Rowanclaw's father, than how come he isn't dead? I mean, come on, his son is older than Yellowfang, who is friggin' ACIENT!**

LeafPool-brown tabby she cat

**Oh, yes. And her sister, who is also her twin, isn't in the Elders' Den, too?**

ShadowClan

Leader: Blackstar - large white tom with huge jet-black paws

Deputy: Russetfur - dark ginger she-cat

Medicine Cat: Littlecloud - very small tabby tom

Apprentice, Flamepaw (ginger tom)

Warriors:

Oakfur - small brown tom

Apprentice, Tigerpaw (dark brown tabby tom)

Rowanclaw - ginger tom

Smokefoot - black tom

Apprentice, Owlpaw (light brown tabby tom)

Ivytail - black, white and tortoiseshell she-cat

Apprentice, Dawnpaw (cream-furred she-cat)

Toadfoot - dark brown tom

Crowfrost - black-and-white tom

Apprentice, Olivepaw (tortoiseshell she-cat)

Kinkfur - tabby she-cat, with long fur that sticks out at all angles

Ratscar - brown tom with long scar across his back

Apprentice, Shrewpaw (gray she-cat with black feet)

Snaketail - dark brown tabby tom with striped tail

Apprentice, Scorchpaw (dark gray tom)

Whitewater - white she-cat with long fur, blind in one eye

Apprentice, Redpaw (mottled brown and ginger tom)

Tawnypelt - tortoiseshell she-cat with green eyes

Flamewind- flame color tabby tom with green eye's

**He becomes a medicine cat, Flametail.**

Tigerclaw-huge dark brown tabby tom with long claw's and amber eys

**First of all, Tigerclaw is his evil grandfather's name. It's Tigerheart, please. Second of all, if he were Tigerclaw, he'd be Tigerstar.**

DawnFeather-cream tabby she cat (shes a different cant then the one in tC ok?)

**Dawnpelt. God, honestly, get the names right!**

OlivePaw-bright brown she cat

**Obviously a bright brown cat is possible. And apparently she's a warrior with the name 'paw?**

Queens:

Snowbird - pure white she-cat

**No comments here.**

Elders:

Cedarheart - dark gray tom

Tallpoppy - long-legged light brown she-cat

WindClan

Leader: Onestar - brown tabby tom

Deputy: Ashfoot - gray she-cat

Medicine Cat: Barkface - short-tailed brown tom

Apprentice, Kestrelpaw (mottled gray tom)

Warriors:

Tornear - tabby tom

**Isn't he an elder?**

Crowfeather - dark gray tom

Owlwhisker - light brown tabby tom

Whitetail - small white she-cat

Nightcloud - black she-cat

Gorsetail - very pale gray-and-white cat with blue eyes

Weaselfur - ginger tom with white paws

Harespring - brown-and-white tom

Leaftail - dark tabby tom, amber eyes

Apprentice, Thistlepaw (long-haired white tom)

Dewspots - spotted gray she-cat

Apprentice, Sedgepaw (light brown tabby she-cat)

Willowclaw - gray she-cat

Apprentice, Swallowpaw (dark gray she-cat)

Antpelt - brown tom with one black ear

**And he DIES. The MISERY.**

Emberfoot - gray tom with two dark paws

Apprentice, Sunpaw (tortoiseshell she-cat with large white mark on her forehead)

**Sunpaw is basically a tortoiseshell version of Starkit, then?**

Heathertail - light brown tabby she-cat with blue eyes

**DIE, Heathertail, DIE!**

Breezepelt - black tom with amber eyes

Elders:

Morningflower - very old tortoiseshell queen

Webfoot - dark gray tabby tom

RiverClan

Leader: Leopardstar - unusually spotted golden tabby she-cat

Deputy: Mistyfoot - gray she-cat with blue eyes

Medicine Cat: Mothwing - dappled golden she-cat

Apprentice, Willowshine (gray tabby she-cat)

Warriors:

Blackclaw - smoky-black tom

Voletooth - small brown tabby tom

Apprentice, Minnowpaw (dark gray she-cat)

Reedwhisker - black tom

Mosspelt - tortoiseshell she-cat with blue eyes

Apprentice, Pebblepaw (mottled gray tom)

Beechfur - light brown tom

Rippletail - dark gray tabby tom

Apprentice, Mallowpaw (light brown tabby tom)

Graymist - pale gray tabby

Dawnflower - pale gray she-cat

Dapplenose - mottled gray she-cat

Pouncetail - ginger-and-white tom

Mintfur - light gray tabby tom

Apprentice, Nettlepaw (dark brown tabby tom)

Otterheart - dark brown she-cat

Apprentice, Sneezepaw (gray-and-white tom)

Pinefur - very short-haired tabby she-cat

Apprentice, Robinpaw (tortoiseshell-and-white tom)

Rainstorm - mottled gray-blue tom

Duskfur - brown tabby she-cat

Apprentice, Copperpaw (dark ginger she-cat)

Queens:

Icewing - white cat with green eyes, mother of Beetlekit, Pricklekit, Petalkit, and Grasskit

Elders:

Heavystep - thickset tabby tom

Swallowtail - dark tabby she-cat

Stonestream - gray tom

**Please review, if you aren't already dead, and give me an opportunity to not cry, please!**

**And, in the next chapter, I get to the actual story!**


	2. Prologue

Chpater 1: Prolouge

The cats gathered around a pool. They all looked into it eagerly. A dark shape appeared on the surface. A blue she cat looked up. Her eyes were bright.

**Because everyone knows that everyone loves blue cats with bright eyes described in short sentences, right everybody?**

"There is a prophecy!" She said. "out of the darkness, stars will come and get rid of the evil tiger and holly."

**OMFG, Tigerstar and Hollyleaf!**

"Its about StarKit!" A white tom said. "Shes going to save the forest," He looked at a gold tom by BlueStar. "she has powers nobody dreamed of." Said the gold tom. "Should we tell JayFeather?" He asked. "Yes." Said BlueStar. "he needs to know."

**Well. No. DUH! Of course the prophecy is about Starkit! And Jayfeather is medicine cat, of course he needs to know. And how did the story know that Bluestar was Bluestar?**

She walked away from the pool to tell JayFeather about the prophcy.

**Well, talk about the obvious. And I just love prophcys, don't you? :D**

did u like it? plz tell me in urm review!

**What she said.**


	3. Chapter 1

**I, Dianacutie, OCD survivor of the first two parts of Starkit's Prophecy, shall continue this awful BadFic. Please, send donations to help this charity! BTW, I don't own the world's worst badfic. xdarkrosesx does.**

Chapter 2 the Rise of a Heroin

ok jazzie-kun pleas dont get mad at me cause your not in it yet. You'l apear soon dont worry.

StarKit wock up and sunlit was in the branches. She closed her eyes againstill tired. Butter mom wouldn't let her sleep not today.

**Butter is everything. Dawnsparkle must be epic. She also must defeat the squid army. And I just love wocking up, don't you?**

"Sweety its time to get up" said Dawnsparkle; her eys shinning. "Today is important today."

**Oh. My. STARCLAN! Gee, I wonder what day TODAY is?!**

"What is it Mom" said StarKit awake right away. Then the she cat rememembered what today was.

**I just love the word remememem...emem... bered? I can't pronounce it. Plus, cats obviously call their mothers,"Mom,"**

"Ohmigosh its my serimony today!' she squelled excercisedly. Today was the day she was an apprentice!

**OMFG I just love serimonys, don't you?**

She flicked outside not even waiting for her Mom. But her Mom cot up to her quick.

**Flicking outside and cotting up quick. Such wonderful word use/spelling!**

"Sweety you know the clans don't except cat slike use sometimes." She said.

**Yes. And by more specific rules, MARY-SUES!**

StarKit glared. She didn't lake beig told that. Just because her Mom was a usedto be Shadowclan cat and her dad was jayFeather the medicine Cat didn"t mean she ws different!

**Isn't Jayfeather not allowed to have kits?**

"StarPaw come here." Said FireStar from the leg. He jumped down.

**Yes, I love saying things from my leg. It has a mouth on it, you just have to look very closely...**

"StarKit it s tome for you to become an apentice: he said. "Your a strong brave cat and because of that I will mentor with you."

**Oh. My. F**king. StarClan. A mary-sue mentoring a mary-sue?!**

Ever body gasped. StarKit did too. Se herd hear mother say "Wow!".

**Wow! A mary-sue has never mentored another mary-sue! Not EVER!**

Firehert liked her shoulder. He whispered in her ear "youll be the best their ever was StarPaw I know ti."

**Isn't he a leader now?**

Surpised she walked away when they were done howling for her./ Then she went ofer to JayFeathern and DawnSparkle who were very prod.

**Yes, my mother likes to be 'prod' of me. Excellent use of the word 'prod'.**

"Daughetr where very happy but he have to say something said Jayfeather his chest puffed ouit. "You see there is this prophcy Starcaln gave me it said that out of the darkness, stars will come and get rid of the evil tiger and holly."

**Bum. Bum. BUUUUM!**

StarPaw gasped. What does it mean?

**Oh my god, it CAN'T be about STARPAW... Nope, she's definitely not the main character. At ALL!**

lol I update fast dont i. REVEIW or ill hit over the head with a frying pan! XDD jk

**What the mary-sue creator said... Only I'm NOT JK! Jk. No, JK about JK. No, JK about not JK... *goes on and on and on***


	4. Chapter 2 and 3

thx jazzie-kun 4 th good review! and stop flmaing the stroy!1 i bet u cant right such a good story!1!1

**PFFT *cough cough* *choke choke* AHEM. Now, what were you saying?**

StarPaw walkd over too the appentice's den. Insid she saw her sister's FlamePaw and lakePaw and hr frend JazzPaw (a.n: jazzie-kin ur my bff!) waz slepping on the mos.

**Ugh I'm already dying of the grammar issues.**

"JazzPaw get up." She cried. JazzPaw opend her brlliaint blu eyes and looked at hr.

**Why would anyone **_**cry **_**to have their friend wake up? I mean, really.**

"Do yo want 2 go on pattrol wit me?" she asked.

**No, I do NOT want to go on pattrol with you!**

"Sure!" Said JazzPaw getten up from the moss. They leavt and went two the entrnse too camp.

**Oh, so there are two openings?**

But then, a cat came in thru the entrnce! It was BlackStar!1!11

**Isn't he dead? And didn't you just leave camp? I mean, unless you traveled back in time O.o**

"Shadowclan are attaking!" She yelled. All the cats came out from there dens. She jumped on a cat and clawd him and he ran of.

**Damn, pussy.**

"Good job StarPaw!" FireStar called, "The last cat i new that culd fiht lik that was SandStrom. Your a good fihter!"

**Ok. Another sympton of mary-sue. Damn, this case is so bad, I doubt even the Doctor could fix this!**

StarPaw was happy. She wus a good fihgter! Maybey this was wat the prophcy meant.

**Yeah, maybey...**

thnkx and ples no more flams

**Aww, but I love to flam your story!**

Chapter Three The Traning Under The Star

OMGOSH GUkys im so sorry but SOMEONE glares at rainy days FLAMED ME AND I GOT REALLY HURT. OKKAY IF you dont LIKE thestor y you dont have to readit u know.

**But I kinda have to... I have people expecting an update sometime this year...**

Chapter Three The Traning Under The Stars

Shadowclan run from the camp. StarPaw smiled. Shed one! Noone cod hurt her family now .

**Wasn't it only Blackstar who attacked?**

StarPaw!" said FireStar. "Its time we train!" I want to show you how to fight!"

**So soon after a battle? You're kidding, right?**

"Ok." Sad StarPaw happl;y. "but yo just saw I culd fight, write?" "Well, ya." said FireStar. "But I wnted tol see if that was all you new."

***facepalm* Starpaw, you're practically a kit. How could you know everything about fighting?**

"Ok." They went to the frost togather and the other cats cleaned jp the bodies. "Ok StarPaw" said Firestar one they got their. "We'll start with how to dog."

**Bodies? Wasn't it just Starpaw clawing Blackstar and him running away? O.o**

**(Teach me how to dog, teach me, teach me how to dog)**

"Cmon thas too easy!" yelled StarPaw. Shed just beat BlackStar she was ready for anything!

**Okay...?**

"ok Ok" mewled FiresTar, lets learn how to claw an oponit.

**Didn't she just send off the king of all pussies, Blackstar, by clawing him?**

"Ya." Yowled Starkit. She jumped at FireStar not Giving hiM time to attakc. "She hit his side he didn't move he was to surprise.d she clawed him and he started bledding. "wow StarPaw" he said ".Your doing awesome." "Really?" gaped StarPaw. She didn't think she was doing that god was she relly special like the porphesy meowed?

**You aren't supposed to use your claws in training, y'know...**

"Yes StarPaw." Snarled Firestar. "I couldnteven get away in fast enough. Only scourg was did that before.,"

**Why did Firestar snarl at her?**

"OMGOSH REALLY?" asked StarPaw. Scourg?1? THE SCOURG? She dherad so muchj about him he was really evil and killed alot of cats. "I'M LIKE SCOURG? "I didnt mean it like that" FirePaw sad fastly. "I ment you wer a good fighter. Its really cool." At that minute he thought to himself 'Starpaws so kawaii look at her eys and her fur.

**Yeah, Starpaw is so kawaii she's a mary-sure. DIDN'T SEE THAT ONE COMING? HUH?!**

"Oh ok thanks." They trained floor awhile later StarPaw beat FireStar 8 times once she let him win to make him fel bettar and b y the last one she was alittle tired.

**God, damn mary-sue!**

"Hey FireStar can we hunt now." Said StarPaw. "im kinda hungry."

**Whatever, noone does what a mary-sue wants to do!**

"Oh we'll if you want." Firestar was disappointed he and; starPaw had been having so much fun. So they went huntng, StarPaw messed up a couple times but FireStar said it was okaysince it was only her second time (she'd had her first time when she was a littlekit and she and FireStar had snuck out together that's why he chose her as his apprentice_.

**Damn, naughty, naughty Firestar! You should be ashamed of yourself...**

Later that night StarPaw locked up at the stars. She and Firestar had'd so much fun this day. Theyd brung back enough food for the hole clan.

**So fun, they picked up bodies like, ten to fifteen sentences ago!**

Locking upn at the stars she turned to her best friend, JazzPaw, and said, "Do you think well ever be up there."

**No, nevah**

"Ya totally." Said JazzPaww. "I mean youll be l,eader and I'll be depudy one day well have too!"

**Ya, bruh, totally youll be l,eader**

"Ya." Said StarPaw smiling she loved JazzPaw NOT IN THAT WAY U SICKOS!) they were best friends. She loked up at the stars again and smiled and fell asleep wit the Starcaln voices whisper in her head.

**Whatever, mary-sue.**

REVIEW R MY LIFE

(lol u like it Jazzy I mead you as kawai as I could(


	5. Chapters 4 and 5

Chapter For StarPaws decids

_flamrs ur all satanits!11 anyon who dosent like the stro is a staneist cause StarGIPaw has such a strng conecton with sTarcaln and thats why you dot like it, its cause u do ntlik JEZUS!_

**Well... Don't jump to conclusions is what I would say, but I suppose you already have, seeeeew...**

"StarPaw wok up its tim 4 parole."

StarPaw opnd hr brite reinbow eys and locked arund.

**Bright rainbow eyes... Weren't her eyes "molten orange"? Let's look at the allegiances... Aha! Here it is: "graysh blue-and-purple she cat with MOLTING ORANGE EYES" right there, in black and white!**

"Omigosh who wus tha!1!1"Sshe yellow.

**And it was all yellow...**

"Its me GrayStipe" GrayStrip wisperd in her er. StarPaw gottedup.

"Omigosh Graystip what do u want!1 she yelped GrayStrpe locked at hr. "Wll u be my mat" hE ESked.

**Oh. My StarClan. OF COURSE ILL MARRY YOU! :3 *kawaii desuuuuuuu***

"OMigosh grayStripe thats so nic!" StarKit scremed. "but FireStar alredy esked me."

"wel then hes jst an idot."

***snaps three times* Oh, no she didn't!**

"StarPaw wok up its tim 4 parole."

StarPaw opnd hr brite reinbow eys and locked arund.

"Omigosh who wus tha!1!1"Sshe yellow.

**She's yellowing again?**

"Its me GrayStipe" GrayStrip wisperd in her er. StarPaw gottedup.

"Omigosh Graystip what do u want!1 she yelped GrayStrpe locked at hr. "Wll u be my mat" hE ESked.

**Didn't we already have this nice, pleasant conversation a while ago?**

"OMigosh grayStripe thats so nic!" StarKit scremed. "but FireStar alredy esked me."

"wel then hes jst an idot."

y do u say tha?" yellED STARPaw GayStrip locked at hr meanly. "i dont lik him" sqeakd GrayStripe he locked arund fastly. "hes a mean cat!

**Yeah, true dat. Garystip speaks the truth.**

"OMIGOSH U MEAN LIKE SCOURG?" STARPAW SHOCKED.

**YUSH**

"No ur much prtter then sourg" said Graystripe he licked her on the head I want u to be my mat." he yeleled.

**Wasn't this conversation held with Firestar?**

"Well mabey. but what would FireStar say?" she wispereed. GrayStripe locked around agan. "I dont think he wuld mind." said GraStri;e

"OMIGOSH SUR THAN!" StarPaww yelleded happly.

"Wat ar uo ta;kin abut" said FireHert he was walkin up. He locked angrily.

**Oh, no. He LOCKED angry. Anything but that!**

"oh uhhhh nuthin FireStar go back to sleep!" mwled StarPaw hoppin he would leaf so she culd be alon with grayStripe.

"Yah FireStra theres nithing to wory about!" cherrid GrayStrpe but Firestar didn't leave insted he said i thought I herd you asking her to be our mate."

"oh uh yeh. yELLED STARPaw but he didn;t leaf instead he jumped on GrayStripe!1!11

**Damnit, Starpaw! You blew your cover.**

"I Want to be wit her!" said FireHart attakin GraySriep.

"No I do!" shouted.

**Is this in Twilight?**

"guysys stop fihting you can BOTH be my mats! StarPaw wispered apply like seCert."

"No we can;t do that their can only be 1!11 Howled Firestar. "Otterwies youll chet on us."

"So StarGleam, who will u pik?" giggled GayStipe.

**Uh... Am I the only one who realized that Starpaw is still an apprentice? And why is GayStipe giggling? And why is she suddenly Star"Gleam"?**

Chapter Five Untidles

_UR OLL JUST SAINTS y cant u just except jEsuss it wold mae ur life so much mor engoyable u would never haf to worr/ again_

**Um... Religious advertisement, no?**

StarPaw sad "I..i….." she was so foncusded! Thes to cats hard asked her to b there mates an wht was she supops to do? They we beoth handsome and althing, but bot had matss! Nhd she luvved them both! FirstAr wus so kind and he oviusly likked her allot. GayStirpe was so funny and col.

"!" said StarPaw ass she ruan in to the forest. It wus to muck# she culdnt choss!

**Yeah, I yell "!" all the bloody time.**

She run and ran and run til ur paws her hurtinged. Hen she rrellized she corsed the broader. Oih no she thugh Shadowclan will get me. "wut are you ding here?" sd BalkStar s he waked up.

"I'm sorry!" mewoed StarKit I didn't men too!'

That's ok" sed blackStar. "no wons perfeck.""no that's not true." Said StarPaw, offed. "StarClan is.""Waht do you mena?" wemed BlackStar.

**Noone's perfect? These words seem like lies for Starpaw.**

"well the give us all this halpand stuff" said Starpaw. "without them we wold be lust." She said.

"I gess that's ter " balkcStar said, "besid I didn't relly mean that neway.

"o really why?" said starpaw. "becus yo are."

'WHAT' YOWLED sTarpaw jumping away BlackkStarTried to nugle her. "WHAT ARE O TRIG TO DO MOLE STRAEP ME?1?"

**I'm lost. What's Mole Straep? Is it "molest"?**

"e—" BlakStar started too expaln, but, StarPw wass to quick

"no" she Sid "I don't doned another tom after me!" "I got enog porbelms arigt now anywy!

"but yor pahfect." Said Blackstar. "you betted me in badle you HAVE TO BE "

**I betted against you, dumbass pussy.**

"NO!" shitted SarPaw Again runnin into the forst. Ters ralled down her checks she was cyring. 'its too much" sahe though. "Starcalnb help me….!"

**Please, Starcalnb, save me!**

**A/N**

**Well, guy, sorry for the amount of time I was being dead. I'm attempting to rewrite or bring back my fanfiction from the dead, so... You'd better enjoy it, damnit!**

**JK, you don't HAVE to. I'll just stab you with a rusty scalpel if you don't. :3**


End file.
